How to Last Longer in Bed

by Lovehoney

on 24 Oct 2018


You're having great sex, and everything's going well. You can feel the tension building. Then, BOOM!

It's all over.

It can be frustrating when you or your partner finishes before you've had a chance to get into the swing of things, but try not to let any disappointment get the better of you.

Be kind, be tactful and definitely don't blame your partner. And just because someone has orgasmed, doesn't mean you have to stop sexytime right then, y'know.

If you are worried about premature ejaculation, there are lots of things you can try before you seek help from your GP. Read on for our tips and tricks to help the fun last longer.


1. Slow and steady...

Thrusting, stroking or rubbing like it's a race may feel great in the moment, but the chances are you or your partner will climax much faster that way.

If you feel yourself building up to an orgasm, or you want someone else to last longer, try decreasing the intensity of whatever you're doing. Think slow, shallow strokes rather than deep thrusts, and long, lingering licks instead of deep-throat action... you get the idea.

Taking the attention away from the genitals, and towards slightly less sensitive areas, can also stop things escalating too quickly. And because you're not stopping completely, you shouldn't lose all that sexual excitement.

If you feel like you're on the brink and want to draw things out, try turning all your attention to your partner, using something small and stimulating like the BASICS Vibrating Finger Bullet.

EDGE Delay Creams

2. Delays expected

Many condoms come ready lubricated to make sex more pleasurable, but some have even more useful tricks up their sleeves.

The lubricant in delay condoms like Durex Extended Pleasure Condoms contains a mild anaesthetic to help delay male ejaculation, extending the fun for both of you.

If you're worried that the sensation of wearing a condom is going to kill your erection and leave you feeling, er, deflated, you should try wearing thinner, more sensitive condoms. These types of condoms allow you to experience that sexy skin-on-skin feeling, without compromising your sexual safety.

You can also get delay sprays and delay lubricants to desensitise your John Thomas and aid longer-lasting lovemaking. Try Lovehoney Stay Longer Delay Lubricant or Tracey Cox EDGE Delay Cream.

sexual positions

3. Thrust is important 

Lots of people have preferred positions that they know will get them over the finish line in record time. If that's the last thing you want, try a position that can help prevent overstimulation.

Positions that allow for fairly shallow penetration, like lying down doggy, require a slow and shallow grind which limits in-out penetration and overly-intense stimulation.

Explore new positions with this pack of Lovehoney Oh! Kama Sutra Playing Cards, or take a look at our Position of the Week, with a new position to try every Sunday!

cock ring

4. Ring-a-ding dong

Cock rings, C-rings, penis rings, love rings... whatever you call them, these super simple sex aids can have amazing results.

A small stretchy ring that sits at the base of the erection, a cock ring works by restricting blood flow out of the penis, which in turn can help to make erections feel harder and last longer.

Some cock rings have a second ring which stretches around the balls, for pleasurable constriction. Some, like the Lovehoney Bionic Bullet 5 Function Vibrating Cock Ring, come with ticklers and vibrations, so both partners can enjoy enhanced sensations.

EDGE Stroker cup

5. Get the edge 

Masturbating around two hours before sex can help to decrease your sensitivity, though, understandably, this isn't always feasible.

Another popular method can be used to condition your body's responses during masturbation, when, just before you feel that you're about to climax, you stop, and wait 30 seconds, before continuing. This is known as the 'stop-go' method, or also as 'edging'.

You repeat this method until you build up a better pleasure tolerance level.

There are many toys you can use to help with this practice, and a stroker like the Tracey Cox EDGE Cup Stamina Stroker is perfect for enjoyable edging practice.

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Written by Lovehoney. For collaborative posts between Lovehoney team members and guest authors
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Originally published on 24 Oct 2018. Updated on 5 Aug 2020