Why You Should Be Proud of Owning a Male Sex Toy

by Lovehoney

on 5 Jun 2019


Sex toys for men: they're getting more and more popular by the day, and it's easy to see why.

They're great to use on your own or with a partner, and can help you to discover new, more intense orgasms.

Plus there are LOADS of different styles of sex toy to try nowadays, from strokers and fake pussies, to male vibrators, cock rings, prostate massagers and beyond.

And even though we see male sex toys flying off the shelves every day at Lovehoney (seriously!), we still hear a lot of guys telling us they've never tried one because they're worried someone will judge them, or that you "only need a sex toy if you're single".

Well, we're here to dispel those myths and give you 7 reasons you should be proud to own a male sex toy!

You'll be a better lover

Knowing your body and what gets you off not only helps you get more pleasure from solo fun, but it also enhances couple's play and helps you be a more attentive, intuitive lover.

Being well-versed in your own arousal will help you switch your brain off and fully immerse yourself in play with a partner and be in the moment a.k.a sexual mindfulness. And that can only lead to a better experience for both of you.

Plus, using sex toys which replicate the sensation of penetrative sex can also boost your stamina for longer-lasting sessions. Longer-lasting sex = potential for even more thrills.

You'll travel in time!

Ok, stick with us... This isn't a "where we're going we don't need roads" deal... but it's close.

For most people, masturbation is a routine. Once we learn what sort of stimulation works for us, it's easy to get stuck in a rut, repeating the same thing time and time again to reach orgasm. Whether that's watching the same porn, using the same grip or imagining the same fantasy, it's easy to repeat the tried and tested (well beaten) path.

The problem with doing this is, if in 5, 10 or 20 years, that fantasy you've relied on doesn't work for you anymore or you're physically unable to grip in the same way (or, heaven forbid, the internet goes down), how do you reach climax now?

Learning multiple ways to climax builds cognitive reserve*, effectively giving you a variety of ways to achieve orgasm. This means that the main route to orgasm becomes difficult in the future, you have a handy B-road you can take instead. Think of sex toys as a map, filled with alternative routes and shortcuts to your destination.

Not only can you still get where you want to be, but you may just discover a more fun road to drive!

*Cognitive reserve: the brain's ability to improvise and find alternate ways of getting a job done.

Everyone's doing it!

A lot of people with a penis tell us that the reason they don't use sex toys is that they think it's taboo, and "most guys don't have sex toys". WRONG!

We sell just as many toys for men as we do for women, so the above, my friend, is a myth! And anyway, who cares what other people are doing when they wank?

How other people pleasure themselves is none of your business, and how you get off is none of theirs.

Your pals probably don't tell you the full truth about their sex play anyway coz "social pressure" (and our sales tell us a LOT of guys use sex toys!) so stop thinking about it and just focus on what makes you feel good.

It can encourage your partner to try a sex toy

Even if you haven't considered using a sex toy alone, you may have thought about introducing one to couple's play.

A lot of people ask us "how can I add a sex toy to my relationship / encourage my partner to try a sex toy?" Try leading by example!

By showing them that you're open-minded and take pleasure seriously, you'll help them feel at ease and better prepared to try something new with you.

Perhaps ask them if they could use a sex toy on you to begin with or if they'd be comfortable using a vibrating cock ring with you?

You're free to explore your fantasies without judgement

Remember what we said about many ways to orgasm? Part of that is trying new ways to play and exploring new fantasies, and whilst there should be no judgement within a relationship, it can be easier to try something new without the need to "perform".

Using a toy on your own gives you an audience-free safe space to explore something new and see if it works for you, before you share it with your partner*.

*Side note: You're under no obligation to share EVERY area of your sexuality with your partner. If you want to reserve some fantasies for private time, that's absolutely fine!

Zero responsibility

Sex that involves other people always comes with more risk: whether that's pregnancy, STIs, pulling a muscle or being judged for what you like.

Using a sex toy pretty much removes all of the risk from sex play (as long as you use it as instructed and always clean it properly!)

Disclaimer: If you like to masturbate with a leg behind your head, we can't promise you won't pull a muscle.

It's fun!

The simplest but possibly most important reason on the list: USING SEX TOYS IS FUN!

Sex toys have the potential to skyrocket your pleasure, and give you orgasms that just aren't possible with a hand or a partner (how many humans do you know who vibrate?!).

To completely reject them from your life before you've even tried them excludes you from a lot of potential pleasure.

Of course, it's totally up to you whether you use sex toys in your sex life. You might try it, and decide it's not for you, and that's A-OK too. But if you never try, how will you know?

For those of you who want to give it a bash, here are a few of our most popular and well-reviews sex toys for a person with a penis.


Written by Lovehoney. For collaborative posts between Lovehoney team members and guest authors
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Originally published on 5 Jun 2019. Updated on 27 Aug 2020